CISTERCIAN WOODS - Your Face Is Beautiful

December 21, 2002

I hear my beloved,

See how he comes

Leaping…

Come, then, my love

My lovely one come…

(Song of Songs)

***

Travelling Light talks about consciously and deliberately taking into ourselves all the negativity and sins that are in the people around us, to filter and transform them into blessings, to become a reconciler. I’m wary of doing such an exercise because one could be taking in stuff that one can’t handle. Daniel O’Leary does warn against ingesting the poison of some people, especially if we are feeling vulnerable. There are toxic people whom we do well to avoid until we are stronger. There is an evil that most of us cannot handle. That sounds very true and wise.

During meditation I became aware that I already ingest the stuff that’s in people around me, like I did with the girl last night. Often I just take it in and it goes round inside me. What I need to do is to filter it though prayer so that it is no longer destructive. It can only be done in God and, with His strength, it can be done.

***

After meditation in the church I went to the sacristy to check things out for Mass. I told Br. Oliver that I was leading the Mass.

Well, I hope you have a very happy Christmas, he said, holding out his hand to shake mine. I realised the mistake.

Into the morning silence I had to shout a bit, I’m not LEAVING, I’m LEADING!

Oh, he said, you’re the chief celebrant!

Yes! why couldn’t I just have said chief celebrant.

Being chief celebrant in this setting was a joy. It’s like achieving the dream of a lifetime and I can’t say what to what it compares.

In the sacristy I was vesting between the retired Abbot Colmcille and Abbot Laurence. There’s practically no talking done while the ten or so monks vest for Mass. Everyone is focused - with no eyes averted - and silent. Heads are hooded for the brief moment of putting on vestments and when my head emerged from its hood Abbot Laurence turned to say something and he giggled, oh it’s you. Not that he minded it being me but he was expecting someone else and he wanted someone to be prayed for at the Mass. Things that are mildly humorous, or not humorous at all in “ordinary” life, seem very funny to them. I like that.

The readings for Mass were just beautiful - the above quotation from the Song of Songs is taken from the first reading and the gospel was the Visitation - the leaping of the Beloved and the leaping of John the Baptist in his mother’s womb, at the approach of Jesus in Mary. What is offered to us is hearts that leap for joy at His coming.

Last week someone sympathised with me on being with the Cistercians whose Liturgy she considers mundane compared to that of the Benedictines. Her sympathy was lost on me because my love is for the earthiness and simplicity of the Cistercian way.

It was pointed out to me today that the eagle in the emblem of Mount St. Joseph’s has its claws on the earth and its head in the stars which represent heaven.

Tony Flannery has this to say about the reading from the Song of Songs:

This is an image and a language that the average Catholic is not familiar with, at least not in a religious context.

The great painters of the Renaissance mostly used religious themes in their paintings. But I am always struck by how sensuous is their presentation of the bodies of the saints and Biblical figures. Clearly these artistic masters admired and loved the human body, even in a deeply religious age. Obviously the Catholic tradition of the recent past, which emphasised the dichotomy between soul and body, and saw the body as the source of sin and evil, was not always dominant in the Church. But it did shape the attitudes of our generation  towards sexuality, and all types of physical expression. For many of us it was a struggle to accept our physical selves and to learn to be at home in our bodies.

(Waiting in Hope, pp 51-52)

During Mass I remember that this was also the first reading at Sr. Juliana’s funeral a year ago.

Back in the sacristy monks smiled and nodded at me - even those who had previously made no attempt at contact.

***

Emmet and Johnny came by my room at 10.00 and we went for coffee which lasted over an hour. It was like being back in former times. Johnny and I went for a walk and a chat in the rain and ended up at Br. Peter’s crib down on the farm.

Met some of Youth 2000 down at the college. Some find the location cold and not as homely as Esker while others think it’s just a lovely setting. We’re all made differently.

At lunch Br. Emmanuel came to ask if he could have a chat with me so we agreed on 2.00 p.m. in the parlour where we sat by the large window that looks out onto the grounds. He’s a fine person with a sensitive spirit and we had a lot to talk about. We connected well.

Alice and I were the only two for supper and we got talking about her work and about St. Bernard who she described as a man with a perfect love and a perfect hate. Not one for half measures. Perfect hate is referred to in Psalm 139 -  I hate them with a perfect hatred. An idea most of us are not too familiar with. It’s the hatred of evil.

There’s a thing called the Lactations of Bernard. At first I didn’t cop what it meant and thought lactations might be some of his writings. Lactations, of course, have to do with milk, the milk of Our Lady. It’s part of his spirituality of getting nourishment from Our Lady and in paintings he’s depicted as drinking the milk that’s coming from her breasts. He might have had a vision of something like this. The way Alice described it was quite funny.

***

During Compline I had the sense that monastic prayer is very distinctive and uncluttered. It’s not at all devotional or sentimental. It seems healthy and the kind of prayer that suits me. But it does not suit every one.

Lord guard us as the apple of your eye,

Hide us in the shadow of your wings

(sung at Compline every night)

***

O rising sun,

You are the splendour of eternal light

And the sun of justice.

O come and enlighten

Those who sit in darkness

And in the shadow of death.

***

Show me your face,

Let me hear your voice.

For your voice is sweet

And your face is beautiful.

(Song of Songs)